Torquay 0 – 1 Albion

"Sybil, quick, you're missing the start of the match"

FA Cup time against those other Football League “Gulls”, Torquay United. They’ve already beaten us in pre-season last year, and knocked out our fellow League One strugglers Stockport, but I think we should win this one straight out. A big Premiershit away draw awaits us in round four if we do, I can feel it in my bones.

Poyet is going with a 4-3-3, with Dickinson on the right and Murray/Forster marauding up front, and Adam Virgo gets a rare start at centre back. Game on. Even stevens for the first half hour, nothing doing, Forster appeals for a penalty, not given. Jesus this is boring. Oh, a corner on 40 mins, cosmic. Murray has a pop just before half-time, fluffs his shot. There’s the whistle.

Dickinson working hard down the right at the start of the second half. I think Poyet needs to make a change soon, this game is stalemate. Virgo playing his big fat socks off – good for him. Navarro on for Cox, oo-er. Dicko has a good shot on goal – saved, not much else happening, poor game. Corner – CROFTS!!! heads in 1-0!

We’re looking to finish this, Forster comes close. Torquay going for it, Virgs get booked for a silly tackle, we need to keep cool heads here for this last five. Free kick for Torquay just on the 18 yard box, shit. Kuipers saves. Three minutes of injury-time. We’re making hard work of this. And that’s it – Albion reach the fourth round of the FA Cup for the first time since 1993. Who are we gonna get??

The Hovian’s Albion Team Performance :  6 out of 10

The Hovian’s Albion Man of the Match : Adam Virgo

Albion Team (goalscorers in bold):

(4-3-3) Kuipers; Hoyte, Tunnicliffe, Virgo, McNulty; Cox (Navarro 65), Dicker, Crofts; Dickinson, Forster, Murray

(Subs) Brezovan, Elphick, Navarro, Bennett, Davieeees, Hart, Whing

Cup Fever!!

Who's up for an Albion cup run this season?

Stockport County or Torquay v Brighton

I wanted a shitty draw to be fair – a winnable fixture so we can progress and maybes get a Premiershit team away in the fourth round when I’m home again. And Stockport or Torquay away is very winnable indeed! Oh yes.

These two will play their re-scheduled match on 8th December, I think I’ve got my FA Cup mojo back.

Jake Wright is a Seagull

Great news. Although Crawley Town fans tell me he’s a natural centre back it looks like Wright will slot into cover Jim McNulty at left back. The new signing played for us at Torquay and was man of a very poor match for us.

Hearts were the SPL club interested in signing him, and offered a lot more money for Wright, but he seems to like life in Sussex. Good lad!

Russell Slade has made quite a few signings this summer, pre-season has been poor, but the buck stops next Saturday 8th August.

Torquay United 1 – 0 Albion

Looks like he's enjoying the match at least

Torquay. I’ve never been, but whenever I hear that word “Torquay” I always think of one immortal (and fictional) denizen of the little seaside resort, Basil Fawlty. I’ve had a few ales tonight before listening to this game – my best buddy is leaving Afghanistan after 3 years and we gave him a BBQ send-off. But enough of that, the Albion are playing Torquay United in a pre-season friendly, what’s more important?

The new Seagulls World site isn’t working, I’m on the old one listening to the Torquay tannoy, what is going on? They are so amateurish. It’s gone – no commentary, just about got the starting 11. Fook me. Back on.

Starting 11 look like the strongest Slade could’ve put together. Jake Wright the Crawley player getting a run out at left back, still the problem position for us, very interesting, we’ll see. He’s made a steady start. Forster and Spiller look sharp too. On 15mins Virgo and Elphick in a muddle, Virgo clears, Jake Wright looking composed.

Torquay attack and Kuipers makes good save, is Dickinson on the pitch? All Torquay, Jesus! Kuipers saves us again. Lacklustre, pre-season bores. I should have stayed and got minging at the BBQ. Dicko gets a touch on 30 mins! Fooking hell 1-0 to Torquay, took us apart and a tap-in (40 mins). Forster shoots and misses. Woeful. H/T.

No changes at H/T mmm – are we looking at our starting 11 for Walsall August 8th? Crofts scores!!! No, offside? Not given. Shite. Slade has ripped each of them a new arsehole, obviously. Mark Wright shoots! saved! Different side so far this half. Even Dicko looks interested. Mass substitution on 60 mins. Craig Davies injured, trying to run it off.

El Abd on for Whing on 70 mins. Jake Wright now centre back and  still playing well, the non-league man is leading the way. Smith now makes a good save, both our keepers are on top of their game, they look like they need to be for this season. Albion running out of steam, weaker players on IMHO. Davies getting booked for gobbing off, hang on – HE’S BEEN SENT OFF. Torquay’s man sees yellow, eh? Pants. Could be a three game ban now.

Navarro flicks on, Tunnicliffe heads – saved! Forster has an ice-pack on his dodgy knee, not looking good. Dicko and Murray up front for Walsall? Torquay finishing strong, three back to back chances. Blow it up ref, Jesus!

It’s over, rotten game. Nighty night

Xenophon’s Albion Team Performance : 3 out of 10

Xenophon’s Albion Man of the Match : Jake Wright

Albion Team (goalscorers in bold):

(4-4-2) Kuipers (Smith 60) ; Whing (El Abd 70), Elphick (Chronis 60), Virgo (Tunnicliffe 75), J Wright ; M Wright (Navarro 60), Spiller (Thornhill 60), Crofts (Dicker 60), Cox (J Smith 75); Forster (Murray 60), Dickinson (Davies 60);

Friendly match against AFC Wimbledon

Albion travel to Kingsmeadow in Kingston to take on AFC Wimbledon in a pre-season friendly match next Tuesday, 21 July.

Should be an interesting game playing the remnants of the old Crazy Gang (forget that bunch of imposters up in Milton Keynes).

 

Meanwhile, here’s the team’s full friendly fixture list:

Tue 14th v Havant & Waterlooville

Sat 18th v Stevenage Borough

Tue 21st v AFC Wimbledon

Fri 24th v Crawley Town

Tue 28th v Torquay Utd

Sat 1st v Scunthorpe Utd

As far as I know these are all away games