Albion 1 – 0 Sunderland

Nice game, shame about the photo

I decided to sample the delights of the North Stand last night, just to see how a match looks & sounds in the bleachers. Apologies for the shitty photo, but I hadn’t much time to concentrate on photography during this classic match. I miss the old banter of the North Stand lot, and the goal end view isn’t as bad as I thought it would be; in fact I’m sorely tempted to move my season ticket over there for next year.

What can you say about this game? Sunderland were as poor as they were when we met met them in the Algarve last summer, and judging by the amount of abuse Steve Bruce took off the mackems back then I’m as surprised as anyone he’s still manager today (that might change soon of course).

The first fifteen minutes were ours, then Sunderland edged the rest of the first half, just. The second half was an ode to Gus Poyet, his way of playing football has truly come of age, and Brighton & Hove Albion are back in the big time, no doubt about it. Facing a team of World Cup players, internationals, ex-Man Utd stalwarts and, er, Anton Ferdinand, we were undaunted and gave them a right runaround. For want of better finishing/better luck this game wouldn’t even have reached extra-time.

We hit the post, had a penalty disallowed (although most people now admit Calderon dived and deserved his booking) and with Craig Noone destroying them from both wings the impressive 1205-for-a-Tuesday-night away contingent were one glum-looking bunch. Everyone had a good game, but most impressive were Dunk, Calderon, a very impressive return for Alan Navarro, Bridcutt, new boy Ryan Harley, CMS, Barnes, and our story of the season so far – Craig Noone. Having both Bridcutt and Navarro on the pitch was great, our passing was the neatest I’ve seen so far this season as a result, and just when Sunderland had had enough of tricky run-at-you wingers like Noone, LuaLua was brought on to torment them further. And people, we still have Buckley and Hoskins to add to this team, what an attacking midfield we have at the club right now, unbelievable.

The goal in extra-time was worth the wait, Navarro crossing for CMS to nod home his third of the season. The only black marks were the injuries to both Greer and Vincelot, although the Frenchman is easier replaced than our big captain. Here’s hoping for an even bigger draw next round.

The Hovian’s Team performance : 8.5 out 10

The Hovian’s Man of the Match : Craig Noone

Attendance: 17,019 (1,205 Mackems)

Albion 1 – 0 Gillingham

Trip the light fantastic

A fairly inauspicious start to what may yet turn out to be a classic Abion cup run. But another historic night as the first game under floodlights was played at Falmer, shame the match didn’t dazzle the senses.

Before I speak about the match I have to mention the journey to and back from Falmer. As there were only 16,295 souls at the game, 1328 of whom travelled from Gillingham, you’d expect less of a crush getting there. Not a bit of it. I changed tactics and decided to have a beer in Hove, then catch the train from there instead of Brighton itself. When the train rumbled in from Portslade it was already chocka, we had to force our way onto a sweaty, smelly feet and BO stinking and cramped cattle truck. I couldn’t move my arms for the short hop to Brighton.

When we scrambled onto the Falmer train it was the same sketch, hot & horrible & dangerously overcrowded, with some very anxious looking old people and small kids stuck in the mix, this isn’t good enough. On the way back we took one look at the humongous queue for the trains home and decided to interlope into the bus queue. Luckily enough a number 25 pulled up, already half-full with bewildered foreign university students, to exactly where me and my pal were stood in the throng. But we still had to sharp elbow it onto the coach. Again, this is a bad accident waiting to happen. Brighton & Hove Council and Southern Railway need to get together and put on bigger trains and more buses. Sort it out.

The match started well for the Albion, dominating a typically hoof-balling League Two side in our erstwhile landlords. Their almost cockney fans must be affected with the same malaise as their rioting city cousins in the capital, they’re a bad tempered lot. The main reason was the little fat ref, who to be fair to him, was crap, and did none of the two teams any favours. How it stayed 0-0 at half-time was down to the stubborn and sometimes ruthless physical defending by the visitors.

Second half and the Albion just stopped playing, that’s all I can say, not bad enough to make Gills a danger, but enough to make for a poor 45 minutes of football. Will Buckley’s penalty was the one incident where the over-gobby Gills fans had a point about the dodgy ref, it wasn’t one, there was no contact from where I was sitting. But hey ho, we’ll take any offered, and Barnes put it away with panache. The game died out after that, apart from some nasty Gillingham fouling, but this Albion team will have to get used to that now that everyone knows how we play. Shit game or no, this win sets up a potential ‘Big Club’ opponent next round, so I’m not that annoyed.

Best players were new boy Romain Vincelot, a tricky looking character, the ever-dependable Greer, Barnes battled hard but didn’t get enough chances, Buckley again impressed, but my man of the match was Craig Noone, the lanky scouser has been a revelation right at the start of this season.

Apologies about the poor quality of my phots, but I couldn’t be arsed to lug my usual camera up to Falmer last night so used my HTC phone instead, it would have been crushed in the rush to get there and home anyway. See you at Pompey Saturday.

The Hovian’s Team performance : 6.5 out 10

The Hovian’s Man of the Match : Craig Noone

Attendance: 16,295 (1328 Gillingham)

Northampton 2 – 0 Albion

Not arsed. When I say not arsed I mean I don’t care about getting beaten in the Carling Cup, after all Gus Poyet played a lot of second string players here. I’m more bothered that Alan Navarro is properly crocked, and Matt Sparrow is out for three games after getting a straight red. Two games into the 2010/11 season and the Albion already have four yellows and one red to show for their troubles.

Stuck again at work, I was more than a little pleased to be sat inside, out of the wind and rain, listening to a dismal football match on the wireless. I bet it pisses down at Withdean on Saturday as well.

Painting not decorating

Top footballing action from last year's Johnstone's Paint Trophy Final

When the Seagulls slipped quietly out of the Carling Cup there wasn’t so much as a whimper from this website. But alas, all is not finished on the Mickey Mouse Cup front just yet. For now we have the mother of all Walt Disney productions – the unfathomably pointless Johnstone’s Paint Trophy. This is the annual reminder for those clubs dwelling in the lower two Football Leagues of just how shit they really are. I mean I’ve never even seen a tin of Johnstone’s fucking Paint, nor would I spread it on the walls of my home if I did, but it’s upon us again and I’ll be following the Seagulls until we get knocked out (hopefully in our first game).

Our opponents on this night of footballing masterclass will be the equally uninterested  Leyton Orient. The tie will take place at Brisbane Road on Tuesday 6th October, and yes I’ll be listening in to every kick and throw-in.

Wallop!

"Fancy a prawn sandwich at half-time Bert?"

Bit of a giggle at Upton Park last night, West Ham 3 – 0 Millwall. But who knows the real result outside the ground, between the ICF and Bushwackers? I’d put money on the Millwall firm. The funniest thing about last night’s telly was watching obese 40-50 year old Hammers’ “shirts” trying to run the length of the pitch to get at Millwall.

So, after the middle-class takeover of the game post-Fever Pitch, the working-class oiks prove once again that football fans can still be found having an “off” every once in a while. Prawn sandwich anyone?

Of course the Seagulls are visiting the New Den this Friday night, but I definitely won’t be there as I’m flying back to Kabul tomorrow. I expect there to be more police than usual at the game, even though it looks like West Ham were the real trouble-makers last night, inside the ground anyway. It could be a good time to play Millwall right now, a hard mid-week cup game with extra-time, a riot and a 3-0 defeat can play havoc with your confidence. Game on.

Swansea 3 – 0 Albion

Tonight's match sponsor

The Carling Cup, brought to you by Walt Disney Productions. Sorry, but I’m not a cup man, I’m all league football. Ever since Manure decided they were too good to play in the hitherto prestigious flagship of British Football – the FA Cup – I’ve even less interest in cup games. The Carling Cup is about as exciting as one of Alex Ferguson’s slagfest press conferences. Now, if the Seagulls were to get within spitting distance of Wembley, I might get mildly enthused, but it’s the grind and struggle of the football league that really floats my dolphin.

That said, Brighton & Hove Albion are playing a competitive football match tonight, so I’m listening in on Seagulls Player, as duty must. It is another chance for this new team to get to know each other after all.

Finally get Seagulls Player online 8 minutes into the game. Albion playing Forster/Dickinson up front, 4-4-2. Worked better on saturday, not so good against Scunny in pre-season. 1-0 to Swansea after Jake Wright gets booked and the Swans score from the dead ball. Mark Wright dropped, strange decision. Still no Gary Dicker in midfield. Seagulls Player commentary goes off and now two Welsh twats are on there for Swansea. They’ve gone again, boyo.

Swans miss an open goal. Seagulls Player is absolute fooking wank, a waste of my fooking hard earned money. I’m just about to launch my laptop off the balcony. It won’t stay on for more than 2 minutes at a time. Oh great back on just in time for half bastard time.

Jake Wright taken off after a ‘mare marking Nathan Dyer, Whing moving to left back and El-Abd on at right back. Mark Wright on for Crofts. Once again Virgo and Elphick playing well at the back. Kuipers makes another sensational save after a short period of Albion pressure. 2-0 straightaway, Swansea are taking us apart on the break. I reckon we put this one to bed.

Murray on for Dicko on 65 minutes, still frustrating times for the big ex-Derby hitman. Nothing happening for us. Dead in the water. Swansea deliver the coup de grace in injury time, 3-0.

It wasn’t to be tonight, Swansea are a far better football team, get this Carling Cup nonsense out of the way, we all had a night versus Man City a wee while ago, big deal, Football League One is where it’s at. Bring on the Bees on Saturday. That is all.

Xenophon’s Albion Team Performance : 5 out of 10

Xenophon’s Albion Man of the Match : Tommy Elphick

Albion Team (goalscorers in bold):

(4-4-2) Kuipers; Whing, Elphick, Virgo, J Wright (El-Abd 45) ; Thornhill, Navarro, Crofts (M Wright 45), Cox ; Dickinson (Murray 65), Forster